The Karan Thapar, The SRK And The SMS!

Who has not heard of Karan Thapar and his syndicated colunts in a leading daily. Well, here is an interesting and amusind anecdote about Karan and SRK, so sit back and enjoy as Tahpar relates it


Shah Rukh, Mummy and Me

"For someone who is supposed to be intelligent you, can at times be incredibly stupid. Don't you ever pause to think before you shoot your mouth off?"

That, incidentally, is the sort of thing my closest friends repeatedly say to me. It's their way of saying they care. Usually I smile disarmingly and dismiss the criticism. I'm never offended nor, to be honest, do I take it seriously.

Last week, however, I realised how right they were. If only I had listened to them earlier, I would not have made such a prized fool of myself. But then, we all learn the hard way. It started when my mobile phone began beeping. I rushed to pick it up only to find I was in the process of receiving an SMS message. Now, I receive several, and often they can be perplexing. This one was straightforward except for the sender's name. It read : "This is to tell you my number has changed to x x x. Love, SRK."

Who, I asked myself, is SRK? The initials meant nothing to me and I could not think of who might they belong to. The more I tried, the less I seemed to be able to work things out. So, curiousbut not wanting to appear rude, I rang the number given. It was answered by a voicemail.

"Hi." I started off cheerfully. "Thanks for your message informing me of your new number but I can't work out what your initials stand for. Sorry about this but my mind is a complete blank. So be a sport and fill in the mystery. Let me know who you are."

I thought I had been rather clever. To my mind, my message felt like discretion itself. Polite, witty though self-deprecating yet to the point. In fact, so pleased was I with myself that I walked out of my office and started to tell my colleagues what I had just done.

"Christ!" said Vishal, when I finished. "You're joking, aren't you?" "No." I said a little startled. "Why would I be joking? You can see the SMS on my mobile. It's still there." "Not the message." He continued, "It's your reply I'm talking about. Surely you know who SRK is?" "No," I insisted. "I don't."

But strangely I don't recall Vishal telling me. I'm not sure what happened but I guess someone or something interrupted us and the subject slipped from our attention. Anyway, I soon forgot all about it. Until later, that night.

I was sitting at my mother's when it happened. The family tends to congregate around the television pretending to listen to the news. Actually, instead of listening, we all talk simulataneously - or do I mean quarrel? - and none of us is any wiser after the broadcast. That night was no different until the phone rang. I'm not sure how I heard it above the din but what I did notice is that as the others heard me talking the room hushed to pin drop silence.

"SRK?" I said. "What do you mean why you're SRK?"

And then suddenly, like a blow on my head, I recognized the voice. I've heard it a thousand times before. I recalled its particular tone, its sepacial way of speaking, its half-mocking quality. Oh my god, of course, this is SRK! It had to be. The initials fit perfectly. Why, why, why had I not thought of it earlier?"

"I'm really sorry Shah Rukh." I started to splutter. "I never thought it was you. You must think I'm an ***. The problem is I know you as Shah Rukh Khan and not SRK."

"No, the fault is mine." The voice from the other side reassuringly replied. "It's just that everyone in Mumbai calls me SRK so I assumed the initials would make sense. But I guess this proves I am not as popular as I think I am!"

He was being generous and excusing my lapse. But the mistake was mine. I suddenly realised why Vishal had been so surprised. To him, SRK made immediate sense and he couldn't fathom why I was thrown away by the same initials.

I was still apologising when Mummy interrupted me. I was repeating for the umpteenth time that I was an idiot. Shah Rukh, I suspect, was beginning to believe me. I can be very convincing when it's not in my interest to be. That's when Mummy spoke up.

"Tell him his mother thinks so too. In fact, not just an idiot but a complete bloody fool!"

So I did. I interrupted myself and conveyed her message instead.

"Don't worry, mums always think their sons are idiots," Shah Rukh replied. And then, dropping the famous voice almost to a whisper, he added. "Sometimes they're right."